Don’t You Talk About My Momma

I was recently painting a room in our house and I had some extra time to think, so I started thinking about the responsibilities of men toward women.

Why was I thinking about this?

I was painting a bedroom for my beautiful wife and that room will hopefully soon be the bedroom for a little baby girl that we are hoping to adopt in April or May.

So while serving my wife I started thinking about being a daddy (father) and how I do not want to spoil the daughter we may have (this could be a problem for me), but I certainly want to protect her heart by giving her the attention and masculine security she needs. I want to treat her so well that I would protect her heart by setting a high standard of masculinity for any young many who would want to take over the privilege of leadership, protection and provision that she would need and deserve. I would want to love her mom so well that she would see what it means to have a joyful, healthy, thriving and gospel-centered marriage. If granted the blessing of being a father to a little girl, these are things I would strive to be and do.

I don’t know many men that wouldn’t protect the women in their lives, though I am sure they are aplenty. After all, if you want to get under a man’s skin, then talk about his momma or sister. I’m sure most of us have heard the zealous response to a momma joke: “No one talks about my momma.”

It’s good that chivalry is still breathing but if this is all that a man does (react) then we have a problem that has existed from the beginning.

When I read Genesis 3:1-6 I wonder: “Why didn’t Adam own the responsibility of protecting his wife that day in the garden?”  Why didn’t he ask Eve to cease and desist, move away from the serpent and find a rock and crush the serpent? Better yet, why didn’t Adam do a better job of loving Eve with God’s word. Why didn’t Adam insist to Eve that God was not a power monger, but a good and trusting God? Why wasn’t Adam prepared and why was he caught so flatfooted?

Adam’s failure of responsibility was on the front end just as much as it was a failure of the moment.He wasn’t responsible to be ready to deal with the crisis.

This is the place I am afraid so many men struggle and/or fail.

Most men are quick to protect the honor of their momma, wife, daughter or sister when they are threatened but what are men doing to protect the women of their lives on the front end? How are they proactively providing responsible leadership? How are they instructing the women of their lives in the word of God? How are they loving them before a potential crisis to prevent a crisis? How are they showing themselves to be trustworthy every single day? How are they serving and providing emotional, physical, and spiritual security in the now time? How are they praying in times of calm before the possible storms?

None of us are immune to surprise, but a man must be responsible to protect and prevent, not just react.

It is good and right to want to defend and protect, but don’t wait until a crisis arrives. Own the responsibility of masculinity and live for the women of your life everyday, instead of purely surviving when passivity catches up to you.


About brentprentice

Brent is the lead pastor and one of the Elders at Eagle Heights in Stillwater, Oklahoma. He has been married to Lacey for 14 years and together they love two sons, Luke and Elijah, and a daughter, Bella.

Posted on February 15, 2012, in Manhood. Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Good article. I especially like the end about being proactive. I am excited about you guys adopting! Praying for you all and the little daughter to come.

  2. You are going to be such an amazing daddy to Bella, I can’t wait to see the two of you together! Love you!

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